After spending far too short a time in Hong Kong, we were off to Macao. Macao, or Macau, has an interesting history. The peninsula is located near Hong Kong, also on the southern edge of China, and like Hong Kong was under the governance of a European country. The Portuguese held Macau as a trading colony from the 1550s until authority was transferred back to China in 1999. Since then, gambling and casinos have become Macao’s claim to fame. Hundred’s of thousands of tourists (mostly Chinese) flock to Macao for a bit of baccarat therapy. The city offers a dichotomy of old-world European historical UNESCO sites and Vegas style gambling and luxury shopping. The partying is not anywhere near the level of Vegas, as orange juice is the beverage of choice.
Jen and I transferred to Macau via fastboat, which proved aptly named. It was only about an hour ride. We recommend buying the premium ticket, as we were the first off the boat and there was no line at customs. Plus, to Jen’s delights, they also give you free cup-of-noodles in premium.
From one Mandarin to another, Jen and I made our way to our hotel. The Macau Mandarin really didn’t have the vibe or atmosphere of the original in Hong Kong. But the views were great. The Macau tower dominates the western skyline.
As if we were guided by a higher power or a giant fruit beacon, we were drawn out of the Mandarin toward the Grand Lisboa…
a monstrosity of a giant pineapple-shaped building. A beautiful architectural achievement.
The old Casino Lisboa sits across the street. We were tipped off that the basement shopping area here is referred to as “the racetrack” because the “working girls” will walk back and forth in this semi circular hallway, and the customers come “shopping”. We had other plans.
The Grand Lisboa is also know for its strange art collection. There are giant mammoth tusks carved into tiny monkeys playing horns. There was an enormous diamond called the The Star of Stanley Ho at 218 carats. Plus plenty of other absurd art.
The famous white and black sidewalks made for a scenic stroll. 
The blue sky belied the drenching humidity and the cobblestones radiated liquid heat as we navigated the Largo de Senado in the old city. Jen was dressed for the weather. I, not so much. At one point, I was sweating so profusely I hid in the corner of the air-conditioned post office. Strangers wondered why there was a soaking wet gweilo conspicuously standing around. Eventually Jen got bored of waiting for my temperature to regulate and we hit the streets again.
The heat did not deter the Chinese tourists’ appetite for the famous Maccanese Jerky – they cut it into strips for you with scissors. It is delicious.
In the nick of time, we found the ruins of St Paul’s cathedral. We hurriedly took some snapshots before every drop of water left my body.
Looking back through the pedestrian streets, a view of Grand Lisboa. In retrospect, it is quite a beautiful and strange place.
Another view of St. Pauls shows how the one remaining wall stands guard over the old city.
After we took this last shot, we found the closest taxi and went to the top of the Macau tower. The views of the old city were much more enjoyable from this climate controlled perch.
There was only one reason to come up the tower – Bungee. This is the world’s highest bungee jump.
In no time I had paid my fare, was harnessed, and had inched my way to the edge of a plank 233 meters high, over 750 feet. At the time I felt calm but if you look hard at this picture, you’ll notice my white knuckles.
According to Jen, as I tipped over the edge of the platform, she heard a huge collective gasp from the gathered crowds watching behind us. It had been hours since the last bungee jump.
“Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention to arrive safely in a pretty and well preserved body; but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming ‘Wow! What a ride!’” -HSTompson
If there is one thing in life that I am truly good at it, it is bungee jumping form. Perfect 10.
This jump is 3x the height of the bungee Jen and I did in New Zealand.
There are multiple safety lines rigged up so that you don’t ricochet back into the building, which I appreciated.
Once airborne, I actually enjoyed the 8 seconds of free fall.
After I got unharnessed (a lengthy procedure) I walked back into the building. A crowd of Japanese tourists who had seen the jump from the top noticed me entering and burst into applause… I was a hero.
Jen chickened out and did the sky jump – a controlled free-fall. She came in wearing a jump-incompatible dress, so she got to wear this sweet jumpsuit.
You can tell how much she enjoyed herself.
The first several seconds looked like a free fall at least.
After tempting fate we decided to revel in our success. We heard great things about the House of Dancing waters cirque-du-soleil-type show, featuring water acrobatics. The tickets came with a free drink which most people use to order a tall glass of orange juice. Heresy. 
Regardless, the show was equally enjoyable with or without OJ.
The next day was my actual birthday, which turned out to be a marathon day of travelling to Tonga. But first, a surprise chocolate cake for breakfast! 
We flew first class on Thai Air to Sydney via Bangkok (thanks to my miles). Among hardcore travelers there is an important distinction between business class and first class. As business class veterans at this point in our trip, we were surprised to be accosted on our arrival to Bangkok by a purple suited lady carrying a sign with our names on it. She whisked us away to the first class lounge on the old people cart. I guess they heard it was my birthday.
I had Manhattans and Jen had Dom Perignon in our private suite. We both had amazing complimentary massages – in Thailand, they know what they are doing.
Utterly relaxed, we boarded our next flight from Bangkok to Sydney. More Dom awaited us.
Full to the brim on Dom, we ate Caviar (which neither of us have ever done on land, let alone at 35,000 feet), changed into our complimentary pajamas, and ascended into dreamland in feather beds. It will be hard to return to Business class.
Happy Birthday Jesse!!
round the world in sixty days 